BUILDING SELF CONFIDENCE

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Building self confidence can be rooted from our childhoods, going as far as trauma and pain inflicted by others. In the way of abandoned parents, neglect, abuse and more. 

But not just linked to the past but the present in terms of breakups, labels, endings and so much more which can add to loss of self control and looking down on self. 

The relationship between low self-esteem and mental disorders can be quite complex. 

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People with low self-esteem tend to see the world as a hostile place and themselves as its victim. As a result, they are reluctant to express and assert themselves, miss out on experiences and opportunities, and feel powerless to change things.

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1. Make two lists: one of your strengths and one of your achievements. Try to get a supportive friend or relative to help you with these lists, as people with low mood are not usually in the most objective frame of mind. Keep the lists in a safe place and read through them every morning.

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2. Think positively about yourself. Remind yourself that, despite your problems, you are a unique, special, and valuable person, and that you deserve to feel good about yourself. You are, after all, a miracle of consciousness, the consciousness of the universe. Identify and challenge any negative thoughts about yourself such as ‘I’m a loser’, ‘I never do anything right’, and ‘No one really likes me’.

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3. Pay special attention to your personal hygiene: Take a shower, brush your hair, trim your nails, and so on.

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4. Eat good food as part of a healthy, balanced diet. Make meals a special time, even if you are eating alone. Turn off the TV, set the table, light a candle, and make a moment to feel grateful.

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5. Exercise regularly. Go for a walk every day, even if it is cold or rainy, and take more vigorous exercise (exercise that makes you sweat) two or three times a week.

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6. Ensure that you’re getting enough sleep. 

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7. Reduce your stress levels. If possible, agree with a friend or relative that you will take turns to massage each other on a regular basis. For other suggestions, see my article Managing Stress.

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8. Make your living space clean, comfortable, and attractive. Whenever I clean my windows or just water my plants I seem to feel much better. Display items that remind you of your achievements and the special times and people in your life.

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9. Do more of the things that you enjoy. Go ahead and spoil yourself. Do at least one thing that you enjoy every day.

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10. Get artistic. Activities like poetry, music, and dance, among many others, enable you to express and explore your emotions, interact positively with others, and reduce your levels of stress. 

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Taken from Neel Burton, M.D. To explain low self esteem and ways to build it.  

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